How do you know you’re ready for your photoshoot?
There is a short answer to this question. And it’s this - you will never feel 100 % ready.
You just won’t.
There are a myriad of reasons why this is the case. Such as women aren’t used to being visible, we openly repel obvious narcissist attention-seeking online and have been quietly suppressed throughout history to stay small. We also have our own physically insecurities and most of us haven’t had much practice in front of the lens or with a kind and compassionate photographer that makes you feel instantly relaxed and empowered on camera. There is also the fear of criticism from old school friends or family on social media that don’t understand running a business or building a freelance career required visibility and there are also lots of insecurities about appearing vulnerable too. And all of these worries are further heightened if you are from an under-represented minority group.
Unlearning these blocks is not easy and my suggestions below are not quick fixes. But the first step in overcoming them is recognising them and realising you don’t need to solve them on your own. Below are 11 areas to check in with yourself and see whether you are ready for your shoot or not based on the underlying fears I mention above.
One of my dreams is living in a gender-equal world and I believe seeing more women’s bodies and faces online is part of that re-balance. Female voices deserve to be heard. I also deeply believe in the power of helping people see themselves as they truly are and reflecting that back to them. Because on the other side of that fear of the camera lays something very special. A brand shoot is essentially about storytelling, and it can be a special way to use your story and not just tell it and it can really draw on both the past, present and future as all of these are the building blocks of your authentic self and brand story.
I really do know how you feel!
Believe me, I speak from experience. I make sure that I go on photoshoots with photographers I don’t know so that I can journey in your shoes and remember the nerves that rise to the surface. It always strikes me how overwhelming certain body insecurities (my teeth) are and how to practice being courageously vulnerable. It also gives me a chance to check out other creative processes, practice some of the strategies that I preach and also discover what’s unhelpful on a shoot. For instance I’ve had to do fake laughing which I really didn’t enjoy and been subject to the male gaze which has made me feel kind of objectified. More on that on this new blog here. I’m sure you’ve had these experiences too as I’ve lost count how many of these stories my clients share with me on a shoot.
But how do you know if you’re procrastinating or waiting for the right timing?
This is a really good question to ask and the main thing to try here is to tune in with yourself. There is a difference between being patient and waiting for the right timing and procrastinating and never feeling motivated to take the next step. Inner reflection is probably going to be your best friend here. Really question your feelings and motivations and where the fears are rising…
Are you pushing forward with contacting a photographer?
Have you set a date either in the near or far future (which may or may not be season dependant)?
Are you saving up/setting aside the investment required?
OR
Are you waiting til you’ve lost some weight?
Are you frozen in fear and not actually doing anything to make it happen, in the meantime getting jealous of other people and their amazing new brand photos?
Are you getting annoyed that it’s been on your to do list for months and still there lingering in your mind?
Your intuition is the best guide here. Be honest with yourself and chat to friends or within networks you trust to undercover the greater fear beneath your procrastination. As a feeling-led intuitive person (ENFP obvs!), I don’t ever want you to completely to dismiss your feelings or inner thoughts, but when it comes to visibility, it’s your ego and conditioned thoughts that are often holding you back. Recently I was getting more and more frustrated at myself for some of the worst procrastinating of my life to reach out to some magazines and it helped to talk to a coach and uncover the real fear which really surprised me.
Books are another place to find help. I believe that every women should read Tara’s Mohr’s Playing Big for really practically ways and rituals to do this deep reflective work. My favouite bits were naming your inner critic and discovering your inner mentor.
But there is a wisdom in another text too. The Places You’ll Go is a family favourite in our house and it struck me that Dr Zeuss has a way of putting prolonged procrastination as energy-draining and doesn't help us at all:
“Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come,
or a plane to go or the mail to come,
or the rain to go or the phone to ring,
or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.”
I love how the simplicity of children’s books often speak to my soul directly. The idea of having regrets are the thing that motivated me the most to make brave, empowering choices throughout my life since I was a teenager from doing an arts degree with all science A-levels or more recently starting my own business. I realised that I could cope with failing but I couldn’t cope with giving way to my fear and wondering ‘what if.’.. I wonder if that resonates with anyone else? Growing up I had a little box of motivational quotations that would stay by the side of my bed and I looked at these two every single day:
We miss 100% of the shots you never take.
It might have been is the saddest words ever written.
Now time to check in with yourself…
So how do you really prepare and not only feel okay about having your photo taken but feel excited about it. Trust me it’s possible! It happens on most creative calls I have. Here is a checklist of things to consider that will help you gain insight into whether you are actually ready for a photo shoot or not. You don’t need all of these to be true to qualify as being ready. I would say if you can say ‘hell yes’ to 3 or 4 of these - you’re good to go!!
Download this screensaver for your phone 📱
You are invited to and feel confident to ask questions to your photographer.
Ask your photographer how they hold a safe space for you to explore your creativity and be you. DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK QUESTIONS! They should be more than happy to share their process and techniques to help you relax so you can make a call about whether you can collaborate with that process. After all the more relaxed and confidence you are, the easier you make our jobs. If you don’t know, ask them.
You trust the photographer.
In my experience the more I pay for a shoot, the safer hands I’m in. Experienced photographers have shot hundreds of (different) people and have a process that just works. Scour their testimonials and see if they address any of your concerns. Do you research and ask about payment plans too. More on choosing a photographer on my previous blog here if you’re still looking.
You know what you want your photos to achieve for you
And this is not just after a compliment on facebook about how good you look! Dig deep into your branding here. Are you trying to get PR coverage? Are you looking to write a book? Are you wanting to show your process or more of your personality? How can your USP be translated into visual form? What conversations are you trying to start? Who do you want to take notice of you? These motivations are key as they will affect the composition, whether shot in landscape/portrait, whether you want loads of blank space to one side, what angles to shoot, whether more looking into the camera or looking away and even the edit and colour toning at the last stage. But most importantly, this deep desire and passion is powerful in overriding your insecurities. Above is one of my favourite mantras which achieves way more for me than the adage feel the fear and do it anyway. Save the screensaver to remind yourself every day 👏
You feel like a show-off, too big for your boots or too vain.
On the surface this is probably one of the main things that is holding you back from from being visible but it actually shows self-awareness and humility that reflects that you don’t want it all to be about you and that your deeper vision is oriented towards the collective good. This is a deep wound for me as I had to give up one of my favourite ever jobs to then be called too big for my boots by my manager (ouch!) and it took me years to realise how it was affecting me negatively and suppressing my voice. But we can rise from this internalised patriarchy. To coin a phrase by my amazing client and friend Prarthana who when asked why she was so full of herself simply replied, “Well what else would I be filled with?!” And if this still makes you feel uncomfortable, the deep paradoxical truth is that you have to really connect to and love yourself as you are before you can help or heal others and the world.
You have a message or a voice deep within you that feels stronger than your fear.
There is something you really care about and you know that by giving voice to it that you can help someone. It’s probably something that makes you feel vulnerable but needs to find voice. I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to write publicly from the wound but a time comes when you feel ready to write and share from the scar. This blog on grief was really hard to release and put out into the world but I knew if it helped one person (and it ended up helping many) that it would be worth it.
You want to be taken more seriously.
Subconsciously high quality images show that you take yourself seriously and then other people will start to as well. I see it time and time again. It commands that people take notice whether on social media or your website and beyond.
Your quiet inner rebel wants to change things
A photoshoot is a radical act of rebellion and revolution. Women’s voices need to be heard. Don’t let them keep you small! (I should have a disclaimer with my photoshoots that I may not responsible for the levels of confidence that you might gain!).
You are ready to level-up in your business or life
A photoshoot is a huge milestone in any project or business if done with intention and focus. Especially a brand shoot (if you’re not sure about the process, then educate yourself here). If you’re a little bored with the flow and rhythm of your business then a photo shoot can help you dig deep, deepen your true calling and enthuse new ideas as well as breathe a breath of fresh air into things. A great branding photographer doesn’t want to just take a nice photo of you, they will reflect you back to yourself in a way you’ve never seen yourself before. This authentic representation is powerful and can also result in tons of ideas of where to head next.
You have an outfit that makes you feel glorious when you wear it and have already imagined it in a photos
When you feel good, that inner glow transmits outside. Beauty is an inner job and your photographer will be your sounding board about what is on brand and going to work for your messaging. I always advocate that you wear something that makes you feel amazing and that is true to what you show up wearing with clients. There are no rules really apart from that. I’m not a fan of everything being too “on-brand” as it can look a little forced. There is a beautiful, clever balance where it looks great but not too much…
You already have a Pinterest board of branding shots. Whether these are colours, backdrops, poses or portraits, these are gold for us photographers as we can see the thread that connects them altogether in a unique way to tell your unique story. I really love this prep part of the process as it sparks unique ideas and clever ways to reveal and capture your authentic self.
There is a small voice within that reminds you that you can do this. However faint. Trust yourself…
So… having considered the common fears that hold people back from a photoshoot and then thinking through some practical ways of checking in with yourself do you think you are ready for this? Take yourself off to a coffee shop with your journal and reflect on what has come up for you here.
And if you think you are ready, then book a call with your dream photographer and plan to get excited! I’ve lost count of how many times on a call that people turn from apprehension to excitement and will end the call with the same sentence, “I’m really excited about the shoot now!”
“You want the photos but not the photoshoot when actually the process is the most empowering part...”
A shift happening. We are beginning to unlearn the restrictive structures that we have inherited as women and believed without question and shining a light on our own unconscious bias. There is a rise of feminine knowing and I see having the courage to step out to use images to tell your story being a collective experience - it gives others permission to do it too.
